I’m always a bit torn by this time of year. It’s the season of my birthday, the weather change brings beauty in the form of leaves and skies, the days get shorter (and darker!), often, there are elections (let’s not go there right now), the holidays are fast upon us, bringing a whole suite of complexity to swim in, and more, to be sure. I’m never quite sure how to be with it all. Honestly, it’s kind of rough.
I’ve been noticing how my inner state is impacted by the seasons. I’ve also been noticing how the patterns of thoughts and feelings seem to mirror the process of the seasons. Meaning: there is a time when things seem to grow and open (spring), culminate in a sustained comfort (summer), begin to feel tired and to wither (fall), and to collapse into a kind of resting quiet (winter)…and then….
The patter is the same, even if the timing is way different. Wouldn’t it be nice if these kinds of patterns within ourselves could be as predictable as the seasons? Sometimes, they happen over the course of a couple of months, sometimes a week, or, dare I say, a day?
Where I’m finding some solace is in the pattern itself. Understanding it as a pattern is enough to begin to let go of the idea that any one of those states is real. What is real (at least, it seems) is that the patter will flow. It may not be predictable in its timing, but it is certainly predictable in its unfolding. And, honestly, that’s good enough for me.